Space

I had an intimate chat with one of my friend last week. In a way I was showing my friend how weak, stupid and nonsensical I am some times. Soon after that conversation , my friend went into an oblivion for some time. I didn’t know what to do? Was it a mistake to show the ‘real me’ to my friend? Do you have to always project your self to be loved?

I keep speaking about space in a relationship.
But of late I have known another face of it.

When one person in a relationship feels like going into his own cocoon for various reasons ,what
Should the other person do? Just wait out side his room for him to open the door?
Or just get on with his life until his/her partner is ready to accept him/her again?

I don’t think getting upset will help in this case although it might make your partner to open the door as he still has that feeling of getting into cocoon in him.

Waiting may not be possible all the times, You feel neglected when your partner suddenly leaves you. It may not be physical all the time, but in an intimate relationship you instantly know when the other person goes away. You never know how long the wait is going to be! You might need support from your partner during the wait and he is not there, this will make the situation worse for you.

Getting on with your life also create some problems since you may not accept him/her when he/she comes back. Since you have gone ahead with some plans alone, you will want to continue with them. At the same time, since he is fresh now, he might need you beside him!

May be one can go on like this forever. But relationships are not be bisected, not to be analyzed, not to be handled using rules. I feel you just have to flow with it. What ever happens is according to the plan

“Unhone vaada kiya tha ki, khwaab mein mulaakat hogi,
Maare khushi ke humein, tamaam raat neend na aayi”

_ chori ka sher

“Unki gam mein hum ne aason bahaana bhi chod diya,
Kahin unki hoton se muskuraahat cheen na jaaye!
Is dar se hum ne shikaayat karna bhi chod diya”